Like lots of things in life, you have to work at making room for listening to music - and it's always worth it. You'll be pleased to know I've read this while listening to They Might Be Giants - Flood. Next up on the vinyl playlist are Jimmy Campbell - Half Baked (a nice Vertigo swirl from 1970 - https://www.discogs.com/master/284878-Jimmy-Campbell-Half-Baked) and the misleadingly titled Fusion Orchestra - Skeleton in Armour (1973 - not fusion, or an orchestra - https://www.discogs.com/master/9579-Fusion-Orchestra-Skeleton-In-Armour - who couldn't love an album with an eight second track called Don't be silly, Jilly ?)
Loved reading this but hate to see myself so accurately reflected in absolutely everything you've said here. I find the loss of physical music has played a big impact on my new music consumption - I used to buy CDs, and I'd take risks on things based on one single or performance or review, but on Spotify I'll skip almost anything I don't recognise. It's too easy not to give it a chance (idiotic, I know!) I have a house full of CDs and no CD player, and a record player covered in Lego. When I do want to listen to music I can genuinely be stumped thinking of something to type into the search bar. It feels ridiculous, considering how soundtracked all of my life has been until this decade (30s, obvs.) but it makes a sort of sense too - now I'm sharing my space and my life and my attention with more people and things than I was in my teens and twenties. I try to play music when I'm cooking and keep it on while we eat, but it isn't instinctual the way it was before. This is a great post, Lauren!
Thanks so much Katie! YES precisely this. It’s sad because I remember being so giddy when I got my first iPod and could carry so much of it around in my pocket – but looking back now, it was the beginning of a kind of devaluing that has led us here, to a point where I rarely have the patience to sit and listen for the time(s) it takes to appreciate a new song. Swipe culture has so much to answer for.
Love this. I have almost entirely foresaken music for podcasts and audiobooks. Last week I went down a Neneh Cherry rabbit hole and it brought back all the feelings. Made me realise that for me music is about feeling pods etc about thinking.
Ohh Sam, that's it in a nutshell. And thinking is great! My husband's Rest is History obsession has practically turned him into a scholar. But I do worry we're overloading ourselves with info and starving ourselves of feelings – plus the chance to just be in our bodies, not our brains, for a while.
Brilliant, Lauren! I like your dad's attitude, still actively seeking out new music. Confess to being a bit lazy about that myself, for all the reasons you've outlined so well here, but luckily my partner and my grown-up kids constantly bring in new musical influences. So do the grandkids (when they're not asking for Zoom Zoom Zoom yet again).
I'm lucky to have a music festival on my doorstep every year and one of my favourite things is to leave the throng of the main stage and mooch around the smaller stages for the gems I've never heard of. Some I might never hear of again; some end up on the main stage a few years later and I can say, "I remember when…"
Thank you Wendy! That’s gorgeous about the festival – I think live music is the most powerful tonic and a total antidote to the feeling that podasts = company while music = solitude. And yet at certain points in life it becomes such a rare pleasure. Hoping now I’ve moved to a smaller city with a great music scene I might make time for a few more gigs…
I hear you! Nothing better than some favourite tracks to sing along with on a long solo drive, but, I’ve realised that podcasts are taking their place more frequently now. I miss constantly having my music playing because it does make you tingle and absolutely FEEL so much, but living with a partner who barely tolerates my fondness for speech radio is an enduring struggle to keep tingles topped up to max…..but the catch up is just so sweet. My son still sings along to Eva Cassidy tracks he learnt by osmosis as a toddler, and he’s nearly into his fourth decade now, and very into creating his own EDM tracks! Great read, thanks .
Thank you! You're so right about the tingle, I miss it! It's just a constant tug of war isn't it – too much content, too little time (and dare I even mention the option of silence, which is a whole other story?)...
Lovely he does though! I'm trying to get into the habit of at least having the radio on more so that there's music in the background, even if it's not music of our choosing.
This is massively relatable. My musical tastes basically stalled circa 2006. I occasionally make a conscious effort to get into new music but, still, invariably, return to Fleetwood Mac or Bloc Party (who I still think of as a hip new band.)
That said, pleased to discover I genuinely like Fontaines DC.
There is so much in this that I can relate too! I also have a horrible feeling that I was probably around 33 when I stopped listening to music - I was a mum of a 1 and 3 year old then and just didn't have the headspace or time for it... tragic!
Entirely understandable though! Meanwhile I'm currently refusing my daughter Baby Shark and making her listen to David Bowie instead, is that... good parenting?
Triggering...now recalling shouting lyrics to subterranean homesick blues in the face of a guy I fancied despite him asking me to stop. More positively, would recommend the song exploder episode about sharon van etten's 'seventeen'. Gorgeous song, nostalgic in all the good ways and great chat. Reignited something in me (yes I am a geriatric millennial with a small child).
Preach!!! I have had exactly this experience (minus the telly which I can only watch if I have time to really focus on it otherwise my brain melts). Thank you for putting this into words with such eloquent clarity - am so happy to have come across your substack 💚
Reading this really made me want to use an iPod shuffle again because while I can shuffle a playlist on any app, I remember the screen less connection to music fondly.
I think I have healthy cathartic moments with music regularly and also (as a teacher) don’t have the time to just be with emotions in an uninhibited way since I’m regularly surrounded by children.
Can’t wait to read more - found this by way of Rosie Spinks mentioning this piece. 🙏🏽
My children are 8, 5 & 2 and with that slightly older child sharing music has started and it has reignited my love for music. (Imagine Dragons, Annie Lennox, Benson Boone , Meghan Trainor & Taylor Swift) Hopefully the same will happen. Loved reading this. I was the same a few years ago, music is so loaded with emotion and early parenthood is so raw makes sense to avoid it and enjoy adult chatting on podcasts :)
Similarly, I have noticed that I’m not listening to as much music as I once did and have been putting on podcasts. And then occasionally, I’ll have this odd moment where I think ‘you haven’t listened to some music in ages!’ And so I put on something familiar and dance around for a bit 😂. I had a great time recently with Basement Jaxx’s greatest hits
Quite randomly, it was while reading an interview with Courtney Love that I came across 60 songs that explain the 90s. Rob Harvilla’s podcast is pure joy!
Like lots of things in life, you have to work at making room for listening to music - and it's always worth it. You'll be pleased to know I've read this while listening to They Might Be Giants - Flood. Next up on the vinyl playlist are Jimmy Campbell - Half Baked (a nice Vertigo swirl from 1970 - https://www.discogs.com/master/284878-Jimmy-Campbell-Half-Baked) and the misleadingly titled Fusion Orchestra - Skeleton in Armour (1973 - not fusion, or an orchestra - https://www.discogs.com/master/9579-Fusion-Orchestra-Skeleton-In-Armour - who couldn't love an album with an eight second track called Don't be silly, Jilly ?)
Delighted to hear that Dad! And I promise I’ll try xxx
Loved reading this but hate to see myself so accurately reflected in absolutely everything you've said here. I find the loss of physical music has played a big impact on my new music consumption - I used to buy CDs, and I'd take risks on things based on one single or performance or review, but on Spotify I'll skip almost anything I don't recognise. It's too easy not to give it a chance (idiotic, I know!) I have a house full of CDs and no CD player, and a record player covered in Lego. When I do want to listen to music I can genuinely be stumped thinking of something to type into the search bar. It feels ridiculous, considering how soundtracked all of my life has been until this decade (30s, obvs.) but it makes a sort of sense too - now I'm sharing my space and my life and my attention with more people and things than I was in my teens and twenties. I try to play music when I'm cooking and keep it on while we eat, but it isn't instinctual the way it was before. This is a great post, Lauren!
Thanks so much Katie! YES precisely this. It’s sad because I remember being so giddy when I got my first iPod and could carry so much of it around in my pocket – but looking back now, it was the beginning of a kind of devaluing that has led us here, to a point where I rarely have the patience to sit and listen for the time(s) it takes to appreciate a new song. Swipe culture has so much to answer for.
Love this. I have almost entirely foresaken music for podcasts and audiobooks. Last week I went down a Neneh Cherry rabbit hole and it brought back all the feelings. Made me realise that for me music is about feeling pods etc about thinking.
Ohh Sam, that's it in a nutshell. And thinking is great! My husband's Rest is History obsession has practically turned him into a scholar. But I do worry we're overloading ourselves with info and starving ourselves of feelings – plus the chance to just be in our bodies, not our brains, for a while.
I just love silence.
One step at a time...
Brilliant, Lauren! I like your dad's attitude, still actively seeking out new music. Confess to being a bit lazy about that myself, for all the reasons you've outlined so well here, but luckily my partner and my grown-up kids constantly bring in new musical influences. So do the grandkids (when they're not asking for Zoom Zoom Zoom yet again).
I'm lucky to have a music festival on my doorstep every year and one of my favourite things is to leave the throng of the main stage and mooch around the smaller stages for the gems I've never heard of. Some I might never hear of again; some end up on the main stage a few years later and I can say, "I remember when…"
Thank you Wendy! That’s gorgeous about the festival – I think live music is the most powerful tonic and a total antidote to the feeling that podasts = company while music = solitude. And yet at certain points in life it becomes such a rare pleasure. Hoping now I’ve moved to a smaller city with a great music scene I might make time for a few more gigs…
I hear you! Nothing better than some favourite tracks to sing along with on a long solo drive, but, I’ve realised that podcasts are taking their place more frequently now. I miss constantly having my music playing because it does make you tingle and absolutely FEEL so much, but living with a partner who barely tolerates my fondness for speech radio is an enduring struggle to keep tingles topped up to max…..but the catch up is just so sweet. My son still sings along to Eva Cassidy tracks he learnt by osmosis as a toddler, and he’s nearly into his fourth decade now, and very into creating his own EDM tracks! Great read, thanks .
Thank you! You're so right about the tingle, I miss it! It's just a constant tug of war isn't it – too much content, too little time (and dare I even mention the option of silence, which is a whole other story?)...
I so relate to this! If my husband didn’t regularly put music on at dinner, I’m not sure I’d ever listen to it.
Lovely he does though! I'm trying to get into the habit of at least having the radio on more so that there's music in the background, even if it's not music of our choosing.
Can I recommend stirring orchestral film scores? Really makes a Tuesday night dinner more profound haha
This is massively relatable. My musical tastes basically stalled circa 2006. I occasionally make a conscious effort to get into new music but, still, invariably, return to Fleetwood Mac or Bloc Party (who I still think of as a hip new band.)
That said, pleased to discover I genuinely like Fontaines DC.
Great article! 👍
Thank you! And saaame. I still consider Vampire Weekend 'new' music. But looking up these Fountain lads now...
There is so much in this that I can relate too! I also have a horrible feeling that I was probably around 33 when I stopped listening to music - I was a mum of a 1 and 3 year old then and just didn't have the headspace or time for it... tragic!
Entirely understandable though! Meanwhile I'm currently refusing my daughter Baby Shark and making her listen to David Bowie instead, is that... good parenting?
That, right there, is EXCELLENT parenting.
Triggering...now recalling shouting lyrics to subterranean homesick blues in the face of a guy I fancied despite him asking me to stop. More positively, would recommend the song exploder episode about sharon van etten's 'seventeen'. Gorgeous song, nostalgic in all the good ways and great chat. Reignited something in me (yes I am a geriatric millennial with a small child).
Omg thank you for this – have just listened to the song once and now, predictably, having a cry. Gorgeous.
Preach!!! I have had exactly this experience (minus the telly which I can only watch if I have time to really focus on it otherwise my brain melts). Thank you for putting this into words with such eloquent clarity - am so happy to have come across your substack 💚
Absolutely love this! X
Reading this really made me want to use an iPod shuffle again because while I can shuffle a playlist on any app, I remember the screen less connection to music fondly.
I think I have healthy cathartic moments with music regularly and also (as a teacher) don’t have the time to just be with emotions in an uninhibited way since I’m regularly surrounded by children.
Can’t wait to read more - found this by way of Rosie Spinks mentioning this piece. 🙏🏽
My children are 8, 5 & 2 and with that slightly older child sharing music has started and it has reignited my love for music. (Imagine Dragons, Annie Lennox, Benson Boone , Meghan Trainor & Taylor Swift) Hopefully the same will happen. Loved reading this. I was the same a few years ago, music is so loaded with emotion and early parenthood is so raw makes sense to avoid it and enjoy adult chatting on podcasts :)
Similarly, I have noticed that I’m not listening to as much music as I once did and have been putting on podcasts. And then occasionally, I’ll have this odd moment where I think ‘you haven’t listened to some music in ages!’ And so I put on something familiar and dance around for a bit 😂. I had a great time recently with Basement Jaxx’s greatest hits
Quite randomly, it was while reading an interview with Courtney Love that I came across 60 songs that explain the 90s. Rob Harvilla’s podcast is pure joy!
Grinning and nodding reading this. Fab